Ivory Bill: Buffalo Bills African cousin...

The Ivory Billed Woodpecker disappeared, then it came back. Or did it. At first I was excited at the prospect of this cryptozoological oddity, but really, it's just a big bird. More exciting than a sparrow, but not a patch on Argentavis magnificens. If the Ivory Billed Woodpecker did exists, we wouldn't give a toss, as evidenced by the western worlds vast lack of interest in the Pileated Woodpecker, a bird so similar to the IBW that only an expert could tell them apart. The truth is, cryptozoology is self defeating: it's proponents love oddity and mystery, which puts them fundamentally at odds with the scientific community whose ranks they long to join, who seek truth and clarity.

In other news, the sweaty morons at Demos have suggested that pupils in British schools should be taught foreign variants of the English language (hinglish etc.) rather than the traditional form. While we're at it, let's teach them Cajun French and maths using Roman numerals. The impracticality of this situation aside, there is something rather queasy about the intellectual establishment (and much as they might hate to admit it, Demos are part of this), attempting to suck new vitality from the lively development of popular culture. India got away from us, and 'hinglish' is their language now, and Hamilton says good luck to it.